Grief Resources
We are going to go through this together.
Losing a beloved pet is one of the hardest experiences a family can face. Our pets are family, a companion, a source of unconditional love. Below you'll find gentle resources, tools, and support options to help you process your loss and honor your pet's memory.
The Stages of Grief
Grief is a difficult topic for many people to discuss because it touches each and every one of us. Talking, sharing and even reading about grief and our reactions to it are ways in which we can heal ourselves. There are three generally recognized stages of grief that a person encounters after a loss, whether it be a human loss or a pet loss; the intensity of grief often relates to the circumstances surrounding the death:
1. Shock and Denial
The numbness that many people experience following the loss of a pet is created by the shock and denial one feels when first facing the news of the death. A sense of unreality may prevent the tears and other outward forms of expression that we expect with grief.
2. Anger and Depression
Tears and anger often begin as a person reaches the second stage of grief. The loss now seems real and it is painful. Grief begins to affect you physically as well as emotionally. You may feel a loss of appetite, an inability to sleep, upset stomach, and other physical reactions. These are all normal reactions that need to be addressed. However, turning to alcohol or drugs only makes the pain more difficult.
3. Understanding and Acceptance
The third and final stage of grief is understanding and acceptance. While no one can ever fully understand the loss of your beloved pet, reconciling ourselves to that loss is a necessary part of recovery. By living one day at a time and taking positive steps each day, you'll find you are beginning to cope again. Your active participation in this process will speed the time of healing.
Taking Small Healing Steps
Feelings of panic and confusion often follow the death of a pet. These feelings can cause us to run from life, to avoid family and friends, and to refuse to try new things. While these feelings are a normal part of grief, our willingness to accept the loss can help us to overcome panic and confusion. At times during the grieving process, we find that familiar and necessary activities are difficult. We prefer to drift in our memories and daydreams. This stage will pass.
Many people blame themselves after the death. It's important to realize that everyone has regrets, but focusing on guilt can prevent recovery. Talking with friends or attending a Pet Loss Support Group can aid us in confronting and dealing with feelings of guilt. Grief changes but it doesn't have to destroy a person's life. It can be a time of real personal growth as you discover new things about yourself and the strength you have now developed through the grief experience.
Stay focused on the small daily steps that can help in your healing:
- Give yourself permission to grieve.
- Don't be afraid to cry.
- Be patient with yourself — grieving takes time and feelings of sadness and despair don't just disappear.
- Find a compassionate listener.
- Postpone making major decisions until you feel you are ready to handle them.
- Focus on your responsibilities like your family, your job, and your friends to rally your inner strength.
- Attend a Pet Loss Support Group.
- Knowledge is power. Learn more about grief through books and videos.
- Realize that it's OK to be angry about your loss.
- Don't panic when you have a setback. Grief has its own individual timetable.
Get emergency help now.
If you're in crisis or having thoughts of self-harm, please reach out immediately. These resources are available 24/7, and you deserve support right now.
988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
Call or text: 988
Online chat: 988lifeline.org
24/7 free, confidential support for people in distress.
Prevention and crisis resources.
988lifeline.org →Crisis Text Line
Text HOME to 741741
Available anywhere in the United States, anytime, for any
type of crisis. A live, trained Crisis Counselor responds
from a secure platform.
crisistextline.org →National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI)
Call: 800-950-6264
Text NAMI to 741741
Confidential, free crisis counseling.
nami.org →National Depression Hotline
Call: 866-629-4564
Free 24/7 nationwide hotline for people struggling with
depression and post-traumatic stress disorder.
nationaldepressionhotline.org →